So, @ashlebo and I got one of these in the mail yesterday. And I’m sure it wasn’t just us. It was probably us and everyone else in our area.

Here’s the problem: We live in a condo. And so does everyone else in our neighborhood.

No one has lawns. For some people, that was probably a big reason FOR buying a condo. But TruGreen doesn’t know that, or they don’t care. I’m sure they got a list of homeowners in the Charleston area and then fired off thousands of these (pretty nicely done, otherwise) high-gloss tri-fold direct mail pieces, regardless of any other information. It doesn’t take a lot of research to look at all the names in your database and cancel out all the ones without LAWNS! and in this part of Charleston, that’s a lot.

Little things make the big differences, especially now.

Greg Verdino once said that hearing the word “viral” makes him want to throw up. Clearly I have a similar, albeit slightly more aggressive, response to the word “leverage” when used anywhere near “social media”.

Why this hulk-smash attitude you might ask? Well, what bothers me so much is that so many people are in such a hurry to leverage/monetize/utilize/monopolize/bastardize social media, that they don’t even stop to understand it first. And along with this goldrush mentality, comes a lot of people who are doing things really wrong.

In fact, the aforementioned Verdino likens it to putting lipstick on a pig. His main point is that maybe you should figure out social media before you work on social media marketing. I mean, honestly, did you run TV spots before you owned a set and watched a few shows? Probably not. Don’t let this be any different.

The good news is that it’s not hard to get into the space and learn the tools and tactics. I know it might seem daunting, but don’t worry. You can (and should) take it slow. Start with (my version of) the basics. People like Chris Brogan, Mitch Joel, Joe Jaffe, David Armano, Jason Falls, Valeria Maltoni, and Geoff Livingston are great resources. And people like Neal Stewart at Flying Dog, Scott Monty at Ford, and Frank Eliason at Comcast are already doing great work with social media.

The key thing here is that you need to be a participant. Get in on the ground floor. Crawl before you can walk. Be the tortoise not the hare. Float like a butterfly and sting like a bee. (Wow, one more metaphor and I might have passed out)

Either way, I still have faith that with patience and practice, we’ll all get a handle on this “social media” thing. But seriously, if I hear “leverage”, you still better duck and cover.

The above may be one of the top 10 greatest marketing statements of all time. I honestly believe that, chicken salad and all.

The message is what’s really important. We often get so caught up with what we want to do, or what we’re already doing that we never stop to just ask why?

Sure its cool to have a Superbowl commercial running, but why? Budwieser, Underarmour, GMC, I understand. But didn’t anyone at Careerbuilder or Salesgenie stop and think “Wait, are we sure this is the best use of 50+ % of our marketing budget?”

I guess not.

My first rule of marketing: Know Thyself.

Roll? Check. Napkin? Check. Full brochure on catering services? (unfortunately) Check.

Fork? No chance.

You can call me old fashioned, but I’m not going to be the first in line to get my next event catered if they can’t even give me a fork with my salad.

Everyone’s always talking about the “extra mile”, but before you do that, you better be sure you have that first mile covered.

“No Sharing, Please”

I was (and still am) baffled by this. Now I’m not a scientist, but I was pretty sure that when you purchased a meal, you were entitled to eat it how (and with whom) you pleased. Apparently not. I understand that sharing at a buffet is frowned upon due to the nature of the business model, but I don’t understand how a regular restaurant can justify not allowing you to split a meal with someone.

It doesn’t take much to figure out the reason for all this: money.

The point is that you really have to be careful what messages you are sending your customers, intentionally and unintentionally.

The line might as well have said “No sharing please due to the fact that we won’t be able to squeeze out as much money per person if you do.” It had the same effect.

At least they said “please”.

So why is EVERY movie trailer filled with praise? Because every movie trailer is filled with praise. That’s just how it is.

It doesn’t matter if they have to grab a quote from the Centre County Times, as long as it’s bold, enthusiastic, and positive. The problem is, that I don’t even really notice/process them anymore. And I bet I’m not the only one. I wish someone would do a study.
jacknife
That way I could watch a trailer that looked like it was made by the director, not the marketing department, and I would decide for myself what THE BEST MOVIE THIS SUMMER!!!! might be.

Not all of it, but a decent amount.

I’m not condemning all market research. Of course it’s crazy to pump millions or billions into a product on a whim, but with the new product failure rate estimated from 50-75% (think New Coke), something isn’t working. And that’s not even the biggest problem.

It’s beginning to feel to me like market research has become merely an excuse, a way for people to avoid responsibility if a product fails. “Well, we just followed the conclusions from the market research…” has become the mantra of many after a failed launch. That shouldn’t be good enough anymore.

Revolutionary, remarkable products don’t cater well to market research, therefore a lot of great ideas don’t test out well and get shut down. The classic case here is the Sony Walkman. As the business legend goes, the co-founder and CEO of Sony, Akio Morita, ignored the market research that said people didn’t want speakers in their ears. He pushed ahead and released the first Walkman, and the rest is history. The real takeaway here, and what gets mentioned less often, is that Sony didn’t ignore all the research (it followed the results of a 100 unit experience test). It ignored the unimportant research.

I think there’s a real opportunity for people to come up with better research tactics/methods, because with the way things are now, it might be a better idea to take those millions and head to a blackjack table. You might have better odds.

But no excuses…

Try doing this in most other industries. I doubt you’ll get away with it. You can’t start calling a car cup holder a “vehicle dependent hot/cold beverage safety policy” or decide that you’re going to call a cheetah a “leopard 2.0 – now with speed boost!” – it just won’t work.

One of the biggest jobs of a marketing department is to create excitement and whip people into a frenzy about one thing or another. A lot of phrases that get invented are made just for that purpose. They’re like fireworks, fun to look at, impossible not to acknowledge, and easy to talk about (ooh..ahh), but once the show is over, there’s nothing left but smoke and empty sky.

However, there are a lot of great terms out there (Purple Cow, Long tail, Viral Marketing) that have taken hold in the marketing lexicon, and why is that?

Because these terms actually have meaning.

They’re connected to a concept or ideal that has substance, and that makes all the difference.

So next time before you coin a new phrase, think about how many times you’ve heard (or said) “I think that’s something that came out of the marketing department” or “That’s probably just a new marketing term for _____” and really decide if it’s necessary. Marketing is already cluttered and convoluted as it is. I guess if you’re not part of the solution, then you’re part of the problem.

The fact that they can do almost whatever they want and not have to answer to anyone about it doesn’t really inspire me to keep it under 65 and not turn on red. It’s a double standard, and the fact that they’re the ones enforcing it really makes it frustrating.

The moral of this story is – don’t act that way to your customers. Be honest and fair.

Don’t set up a rebate policy you know is incredibly difficult and then deny rebates to most of your customers.

Don’t give one quote as an estimate and then charge 25% more when you show up with the truck.

Don’t call something an “unlimited internet” plan if you fully know it’s not really unlimited.

Don’t start closing the store 15 minutes early, and then complain or give poor service to someone who comes in at 8:57.

Sometimes in marketing, the extra mile is the only one that counts.

If you’re running a website or a business today, there’s no doubt you’ve heard of SEO. The industry, which appeared to have sprung up overnight, is booming. It seems like almost every person/marketer on the internet is a qualified SEOer all of a sudden. But how did this happen?

It reminds me of the patent medicine boom in the 1800′s. During that time, the market was flooded with products claiming to cure everything from hair loss to “stoutness” to fever. There was no regulation, so people put together whatever ingredients they wanted, got a fancy label with a fancy name, and peddled it as a magic cure-all. Little did most people know that these tonics had bogus ingredients with serious side effects such as addiction and death.

Now I’m not claiming that SEO can kill you. What I am saying is that it’s easy to be tricked. There’s no four year degree in search engine optimization, and unlike a lawyer, you don’t need to pass a test to be a practicing SEOer. You have to take their word for it (or client testimonials if you’re lucky) and really believe that they can deliver.

It’s important to note that I’m not knocking SEO here. While you could say that I’m in the “Content is King” camp, I honestly believe that SEO is an important tool. However, I still believe that search optimizing a site with poor content is like wrapping a crappy product in a pretty box – it won’t do much good.

That being said, I’d like to invite the SEO readers to respond to this. What could I do to make my website better/more SEO? What are a few simple tips that the average person could use to help them out? And how do you know when a SEO is legit?